My mom.

I had lunch with my mom today.  She's so old, almost 97, and fragile, and tiny and frail, and I'm sitting here typing this with tears running down my face because I miss the Mommie of old.  I would so love to have last year's Mommie.  She's gone way downhill in the last few months.  Still in good spirits and eats well (if the folks cut up her food, which they do), and certainly knows who I am, who the Hubs is, and who Penny is.  She knows my sister and our kids, but The Hubs, Miss P and I are the ones who seem to most resonate with her.  Funny how that is.  She's clearly got a connection to her 9 year old granddaughter.  And I give Pen full credit for that.  That child is so sweet and kind and gentle with old folks.  She's a marvel.  Could be because she has ancient great grandparents.  On her dad's side, she has her great grandma and Leonard, who is about 102.  and on my side she has my mom.  But little kids are often impatient with or don't uncomfortable with elderly folks.  Not this kid.

But I do miss my mom of last year.  Of last winter.  And I wonder how long she'll be with us.  The beauty of blogland is that I can write this, where I would not cry in front of friends or relatives.  I rarely cry.  But because you are all anonymous, I can let go here.  Funny thing, no?  I don't have to do the tower of strength thing here.  If we passed each other on the street, you wouldn't know who I am.

The sweetest thing my mom says to me with every visit, well, when she's awake, is "I love you."  I'm so fortunate to have her. '

Scrabblequeen - That's my relationship with my mom, too.  I've fought with her from 13 to forever, and I've never won an argument.  Ever. She used to tell me that the day I won a battle with her, she's be in her grave.  How I would dearly love to have an argument with her now.  Still, to have your mother for 67 years is wonderful, and I'll take what I have.

Grace - I was at the doctor's today with a UTI, and I just had to talk to him about my mom.  He's also her doctor, and he really understands her issues.  He told me that 2 things would get her:  an infection, or she would stop eating.  She's still eating, but is so frail that any infection would probably do her in.  He was so kind and understanding.  He's not a geriatrician; she's his oldest patient, but he knows old people.  Great guy, indeed.

One sock finished! Whadda woman!

I finished my first sock of a pair for Ravelry's Sock knitters Anonymous December contest.




I want to write up the pattern and post it here as a freebie. This will take longer than knitting the sock, so don't hold your breath!

This was yarn that was on my etsy site. It didn't move, and I really liked it, so I pulled it off and am now knitting it. I feel guilty for doing this. I don't know why; just plain dopeyness.

There are certain yarns of mine that I really really love, and I never understand why people are not beating down the doors to buy them. Then there are yarns that I'm neutral toward, and they go pretty quickly. Go figure. I have this strange attachment to my babies. I'm sending them forth into a cruel and cold world, and I want them to be loved. Is this sick or what? I do get a charge out of knowing that somewhere in the world, someone is knitting my yarn. Hey, you get your thrills where you can.

MOMMIE note: I had lunch with her, and she actually ate more than 5 bites. And then, hold on to your seats, I convinced her to go play Bingo. She does tell me that it's a dopey game, but lots of fun, but she will not go. She'd rather plop in her chair and sleep. I am a cheerleader with her, but the Mommie being the Mommie, she basically ignores me. I have NEVER, EVER, won an argument with her. I remarked on that to her a while ago, and she told me: "If you ever win an argument with me, honey, I'll be in my grave." We do have lots of fun sparring with each other.

Here are a couple of etsy yarns to look forward to, and I love these babies. So there! Their tentative names are Shimmer, City Socks, and Cutie Pie.